Dr Sheep, Professor Lamb, Call Him Whatever You Want: The Autobiography

Chapter 1: Holy Moly, It must be my birthday! Either that or I've just been born!

One fine evening at some hospital I don't know the name of, a mother became a mother and gave birth to a child she called Lambykins. The Father said to her "Seriously? We're calling him Bert!". The mother then realized that Lambykins was an absolutely stupid name so she called him Bert too. And so begins the sorry story of Beepthemeep or Lordbeepthegreatandmighty or Dr Sheep or Proffesor Lamb, or Bert or Jimothy, we're going to be here all day so let's get on with it.

Several months after birth, Bert met his new best friend! His name was Friend, and they were best friends! However, a few months later, Bert said he had to move away, and Friend learnt his first swear word from his dad and swore at Bert's parents for about a week. No really, he didn't run out of breath from that!

Then Beep's first birthday came along. He also learnt how to speak and called himself Dr Sheep. Then LordBeepTheGreatAndMighty and a bunch of other names I'm not even going to say. So then he learnt the hard way that mankind was not meant to fly as he had attempted to do so. And then he started nursery and got hit round the head with a giant stuffed catapiller filled with rocks inside (so technically it's not stuffed, is it? Oh yeah! It's stuffed with rocks, isn't it?) which knocked Beep out for about five seconds. 

And soon came the moment he dreaded when he was 4...school! So in the next chapter, we'll show you the events where he turned into the costumed identity of Sheepkid, why he ate the giant chocolate ponies at a disco and where he got the idea of being...weird...and unique.